Showing posts with label dirty jobs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dirty jobs. Show all posts

Friday, April 25, 2008

Happy Birthday, Drew

No wonder you were so against getting a manual mower. Your parents used you as child labor. And didn't even give you any clothes to wear while you labored. Did you used to wear your underwear backwards? Was it good for another day that way?

Oh yeah, and happy birthday!!!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

I Hurt My Hand on my Dog's Fur


Bathed and brushed two collies. Don't know which is worse - the short-haired version that shoots gobs of hair at you like a skunk shoots stink until it has clogged the drain, slimed your hands, and lays piled in drifts on the carpet, or the long-haired version who keeps his hair in the hope that he can turn it into mats if left unbrushed for more than 20 minutes.


Okay, it's the long-haired one. Getting the old winter fluff out from between all the long hairs is a painful process for both of us. My hands hurt, and I'm too tired to vacuum.

Although the name "collie" is said to be shrouded in history, it is thought that the name originated from the old Anglo-Saxon word "coll," meaning "black." I, however, claim that the word "collie" is Gaelic for Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.


If I'm lucky, Drew will come home tomorrow and be disgusted enough to vacuum. He ought to do it. After all, I mowed the lawn today.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

For The Record

Here are some more jobs I will not be applying for:

  • Power line fixer guy
  • Storm water management guy
  • Garbage collector
  • Sanitation Dude
  • Official White House Press Official
  • Slaughterhouse Worker
  • Pelt Skinner
Then again, its all about touching the stuff nobody else wants to handle, isn't it?