Monday, January 31, 2005

Inside the Actor's Studio - How Scrumtrillescent.

Don't you love Inside the Actor's Studio? I do. It's most fun after viewing Will Ferrel's SNL parody of it. Mostly I love the questionnaire given so achingly lovingly at the end of the interview by host James Lipton: "...perfected by the great (spoken verrry Frrrenchily:) Berrrnarrrrd Pivot." Lipton loooooves speaking French. One of my favorite moments on The Actor's Studio was when Johnny Dep good-naturedly tries to out-French him by re-pronouncing Pivot's name in an even more Frenchily phlegmy accent.

Anyhoo, since I won't soon be called on to appear on Inside the Actor's Studio, I thought it would be fun to rip off his questionnaire for my own use (At least, as I remember it). Play along! It's fun!

What turns you on?

I'm going to assume you mean "What interests you?" The unexpected. And good dance music.

What turns you off:

The stupid. And country music.

What is your favorite word?

I generally like onomatopoeias (which isn't a bad word in itself), but also adore "weasel." Who doesn't?

What word do you hate?

I love words, but if I was forced to pick a word to hate, it would be "can't" without the apostrophe and with a "u" instead of an "a."

What is your favorite curse word?

I don't curse a lot, but when I hear it done well, I sometimes pilfer it for my own use. My two favorites are "g*ddammit"! a la Cartman in South Park and "asshole!" (accent on "hole" and about a fifth higher in pitch) a la Kevin Kline's Otto in A Fish Called Wanda. Which only really works as an epithet to passing motorists, but is delicious when done properly. I still use Cartman's "bad kitty!" a lot, but that's not really a curse word.

What is your favorite sound?

The ocean. A cat purring. Baby Dean saying "yion" instead of "lion" and "yight" instead of "light." Sadly for me and luckily for him, that cute little speech impediment didn't last past his second birthday.

What is your least favorite sound?

Leafblowers. Somebody else's car stereo turned up too loud, thus invading my earspace.

What is an occupation that you would have liked to try?

Travel writer. Veterinarian. Serious Artist. Ballet Dancer. Sheep Farmer. Chihuahua Breeder.

What occupation would you least like to try?

Cop. DMV employee. IRS employee.

And here's my addition to the perfect questionnaire: If you had a rock band, what would you name it?

Great new rock band names occur to me almost weekly, but my current favorite is still Asteroid Pie. Also, The Mighty Chihuahuas could rock.

If heaven exists, what would you want God to say to you when you meet him?

Well played. Want some brownies?

4 comments:

daddio said...

-What turns you on?

My high school sweetheart.

-What turns you off?

"Pretentiousness..." and/or people who take themselves
too seriously.

-What's your favorite word?

Yummy

-What word do you hate?

Cancer, nothing good about that one.

-What's your favorite curse word?

Fuck, it's so versatile. Good- wanna ****? Bad- ya ****er. Bad exclamation- hey ****stick! Very cool- ****in A dude. Etc, etc.

-What's your favorite sound?

No one can laugh like a baby...

-What's your least favorite sound?

A 3am tap out for an Alpha call. (It's a F.D. thing)

-What is an occupation you would like to try?

Test rider for Sportbike magazine, professional winter time Baja explorer, full time fun hog.

-What occupation would you least like to try?

Waste water treatment engineer. (Pooh smasher)

-If you had a rock band what would you name it?

The Pooh Smashers

-What do I want God to say to me when I meet him?

Welcome home Son, your room is ready.

Dean said...

What turns you on?

Spontaneous..ness...

What turns you off:

Lack of humor, asparagus, bad music

What is your favorite word?

"Stutterstep" is a nice, very choppy word.

What word do you hate?

Nothing comes to mind actually...

What is your favorite curse word?

I say fuck and shit alot because I'm an American, and those are our national words. The national word of NZ happens to be my mother's least favorite and rhymes with Runt. It's becoming much more a part of my vocabulary, hopefully I'll be able to leave it here...

What is your favorite sound?

Tie between a well-played guitar and a group of 80 bicycles whizzing around.

What is your least favorite sound?

Big crash on a wood track. Nothing like it in the world. The crack of carbon, the thunderous boom of impact on a hollow, tensioned wood surface, that terrible velcro sound of tearing lycra and skin (if you're standing close enough) and some poor shmo howling about his/her collarbone/wrist/ribs.

What is an occupation that you would have liked to try?

Rephrase that in present tense (present future tense?) and I'd say music journalist, sports journalist (for Cycle Sport, ProCycling or VeloNews), firefighter, pro cyclist, graphic designer, respected author

What occupation would you least like to try?

Anything that requires math. I wake up screaming from nightmares of being an accountant.

And here's my addition to the perfect questionnaire: If you had a rock band, what would you name it?

The Bluto Blutarski Project

If heaven exists, what would you want God to say to you when you meet him?

"Haven't seen one like that in a while..."

Ben said...

"Well played. Want some brownies?"

Wow. That is exactly how I imagined God would be. Very nice phrase.

piglet said...

I like that my theological philosophy has been validated by a man of God...