Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Talk Amongst Yourselves.

This is my day to post, and my time of the day-to-post in which I post, but I've burnt all that time up playing a trivia game and now my mouse hand is frozen stiff, so I am going to go thaw it out.

Bundle up, it's going to get chilly tonight.

Monday, November 27, 2006

By Popular Demand (Well, One Demand)

Here's a sampling of the photo shoot with the clowns. This photographer kicks ass (in spite of her wiggly models). If you need a good photographer, I can hook you up.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

and I did it MY WAY

This year, Thanksgiving my way involved no turkey guts, no pot-luck stuffing with hidden raisin mines (ptew!), no bratty kids that I can't legally strike, and no last-minute gravy whisking in the bottom of the roasting pan.

This year, I hosted dessert night with folks who had been stuffed elsewhere, and were able to come up here, put their tootsies up and unwind with treats and booze.

I highly recommend it.

And the leftovers were more fun.

Final Note: the Ducks have disappointed me once again. Story of my life.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Clearance Sale on Weekend News.

Here are the good parts about Saturday:
  • Spent too much money on clothes without (a) stepping inside a mall, (b) buying anything stiff or itchy, or (c) trying on a bra.
  • Allowed Dean to introduce me to a new chocolate shop in town. So trendy there is no sign. So small we had to wait outside to fit in and there were only three people in the shop. So good you could literally go blind. 150 proof. Like the Everclear of chocolate.
  • Went 30 miles out of my way to get my hair fixed by a genius. A savior of small-haired heads. Thank God for Sherry.
  • Took Dean and Jenny out for lunch. They are funny. And fun.
  • Walked the dogs without getting wet.
  • Created a new mascott for a school based on the successful "Buckeye" notion. I just have to find a school to adopt it. Go Angry Filberts!

Here are the bad parts about Saturday:

  • I spent too much money (bad piggy).
  • I let a sunny day go by without raking leaves (bad piggy).
  • I had to look in the dressing room mirror a lot (piggy piggy).
  • The Ducks lost. Crap.

Here are the good parts about Sunday:

  • Hung around at a doggy gift shop helping a photographer take Christmas-themed pictures of doggies. It was a Humane Society fund raiser.
  • Met two bull dogs, two Shih Tzus, one mini poodle, one Leon De something-or-other, one Irishesque Setter, one mutt, one Cocker Spaniel, and a Jack Russell Terrier.
  • Got my dogs' pictures taken (couldn't help it).

Here are the bad parts about Sunday:

  • I had to drive out to padonkadonkville twice to go to this doggy boutique, and I had Drew's red-light mojo really bad. (Once to pull the morning shift as photographer's assistant, and once more in the afternoon to bring the dogs out to be models.)
  • As usual, the Humane Society panicked and booked twice as many volunteer helpers as required, so we all got to stand around a lot.
  • The Seahawks lost. Crap.

How was your weekend?

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Enter Text Here: I H8 THINKING

So we were at the big game at fabulous new Qwest Field, which puts you as close to the football field as possible by stacking you on top of the approximately 300 rows below you, which gives you a great view of the field, and, incidentally, the blackberry of the party girl sitting directly (and I mean directly) below you.

Party girls are a subgenus of the species Girlus People Readerus, who I am sure you would recognize if I pointed out one to you: holds down a job, but works in order to afford shoes and happy hour, loves whichever soap opera her friends love, and goes to the mall in packs.

The particular party girl I was virtually standing on would often pick up her blackberry and text away with a someone. I'm sure I would have paid more attention to the messages if (a) I wasn't watching a football game, and (b) I had known the content earlier. When I finally looked closely enough to read, this is what her friend had just sent:

"Just bought a Michael Jackson CD - Man in the Mirror gets me every time."


Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Are You Worried?

Don't worry about whether we got into the game. Seven more tickets later, we got in.

Worry about whether I survived picking up a 200-pound retired roller derby bruiser when she fell from the (really steep) seats above and behind us onto Drew and nearly caused a domino effect all the way to the field (sort of a wave gone horribly, vertically wrong). Somehow she landed on her back, so I had to grab her around the shoulders and heave her back to a standing position like Dracula coming out of his coffin.

She survived with her beer still firmly in hand.

My shoulder is a little sore, but otherwise I am fine. I fully expected it to happen. I always sit behind the drunkest, foulest-mouthed houligan in the stadium. Who knew this time it would be a 50-year-old woman from St. Louis?

The game was the best kind: close but with a happy ending.

Maurice Morris gets no respect.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Tidbits About the Weekend Adventure in Seattle Will Be Trickling In.

I'll just leave you with this thought: what's it like to be brunching away at McCormick & Schmick's in Seattle-town on November 12, 2006, an hour before the big game, look down at your tickets, purchased with the best intentions by a dear friend some time ago and see this: "October 22, 2006. Seattle Seahawks vs. Minnesota Vikings. 1:00 p.m."?

It didn't turn out as grimly as you might assume. Although I thought our friend might have a stroke when we helpfully pointed it out.

More excitement later.

OMG, The Circle of Life Gets Really Close Sometimes.

I'm making cookies (medicinal). A tiny birdy flies into the big window and flops, stunned, to the patio. A hawk swoops down and grabs the tiny bird, and holds on to it with its scary but businesslike talons until it stops fighting. The hawk flies away with its dinner.

Deadly. And cool. Icy cool.

Friday, November 10, 2006

I Would Rub My Weekend Plans in your Face, but That Would Be Premature.

We have tickets to the Seahawks game on Sunday. The weather for Sunday is expected to be, to use a meteorological term, hideous. Cold rain with cold wind. In a "semi-open" stadium (Great idea, Qwest Field! In Seattle!)

We also have tickets to see some exhibition of dead people with no skin on. More on that later.

Off we go to the Only Place On Earth Wetter Than Here.

More wisdom later.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

News You Can Muse

Just wanted you to know that my Comcast home page has an important link to a video regarding a python that ate a "gator" and then, apparently, exploded. Haven't watched it. I think the headline pretty much covers it.

Just wanted to update you on the dangers of eating live alligators.

P.S.: Santorum goes down!

Monday, November 06, 2006

Okay, This Has Been Fun. Now Go To Work.

It's been a fun week here in the TAW. I would have posted earlier, but I usually post on Drew's work shifts (every third day) when I've got the place to myself, but so far, it has been over two weeks, and he hasn't been to work yet.

Drew's vertigo is sticking to him like a smirk on Bush. I would feel more empathy if he at least looked sick. Or barfed once in a while, even if it was just for my benefit.

Unfortunately, it is one of those silent non-killers that just makes him feel like somebody blindfolded him and made him twirl around. It can be mildly entertaining at times, but those times are too far apart to make it worth my while.

Meanwhile, this is one of the things that happened:

We had a bird riot in our back yard yesterday when the rain storm pulled all the leaves off the grape vines, and the little neighborhood birds (don't ask me which kinds - that part of my education has been completely neglected) realized that there were grapes hanging underneath. It was a full-blown grape-pulling-off and hopping-around and snarfing-away orgy for a couple hours, until one doofus (you know the type), after overimbibing in overripe grapes flew directly into the picture window and turned instantly into a dead bird.

This put such a damper on the festivities that the rest of the birds just left with those bogus excuses that you always get when a party starts circling the drain.

Even after we disposed of the corpse, the birds refused to come back and finish the grapes. They had obviously learned their lesson about the dangers of grape eating and flying (unlike we humans), and swore off them for good.

The grapes are still bird free today. Weird.

It has rained two and a half inches today alone, probably the same yesterday and tomorrow. There is flooding here and there, but we live on a hill. No worries. Well, no flooding worries.

More wisdom later.